Ok I have a lot on my mind right now so I'm warning you, this could get messy. And long.
I'm not even gonna start on the letter I showed you. Well ok I'll give you one line about them, they either have more money than sense or they were given that stuff free and thought of a funny thing to do with it. Thank you for your thoughts on that by the way. Though one thing that confused me, quite a few people commented saying stuff like 'you should take this opportunity' or 'they've given you the key to...' do something, I forget what... But whatever, they haven't really have they? It's not like I've been sat here writing songs for the last year with no microphone to record them on. What they've given me, is a third microphone and an idea for a song topic. If you're reading this, I don't mean to sound ungrateful, though I must say your methods are... unusual, what I'm saying is, nothing has changed. No real opportunity has arisen. If I write a song about what they were talking about, it will go on my channel, about 6,000 people will see it and it will be forgotten because in my head, it will always be mixed up with the reason it was written.
So there's that "one line" about the letter for you. Now do you see what kind of mood I'm in and why this post began with a warning? I will think no less of you if you stop reading now, whether friend, fan or some other form of individual who has stumbled upon this blog. In fact I'll probably think better of your judgement than those who read on. But write on I must I'm afraid, it's too late to play music and I need an outlet.
Lately I've been feeling a bit stuck. In this city where I live and so few of my friends do, in this routine of losing touch with old friends, making new ones and only being able to see either, old or new, on odd occasions, while communicating through some form of technology.
I haven't seen or even talked to my friends from university in far too long. And we were so close. What troubles me though is that, I could hop on a train tomorrow and go see them for a day or two, and quite soon I may have to, but that's not what I'm missing. I'm missing them being there every day. I know I have rarely if ever mentioned them on this blog, because I started it after I moved back to Derby and it's more connected with my online life. But last year I lived in a house with four friends, and there were another five a couple of houses down. That made me so happy, coming back from uni and seeing who was in, going out for a drink in the middle of the day just because we were students. Even now when I hardly talk to them they mean so much to me. It's Joe's birthday soon, hopefully something will happen for that, it usually does.
I currently have three big projects taking up the majority of my time. A video for student.com which is a large and daunting task, but it's nice to challenge yourself. Obviously my EP, but that isn't moving very fast. It needs at least one more song that I haven't written yet, and I don't write enough. And lastly the collab EP I've mentioned before. This is at least starting to move somewhere. I have most of the songs with people waiting for parts to be done. The latest one I recorded for was a song I'm doing with Ben (Loka). Every time I do something with/find something out about Ben I like him even more. I sent him a first draft of the song to see what he thought, and I was expecting to get back a reply saying something like, 'I like it, what would you like me to do?' Oh no, he sends me three mp3s the next day, one with him singing on it and two with different guitar ideas! Another reason I like Ben is because, in a community where 20 year olds are considered old, he is one of very few 'grown ups' I know from the youtubes. Not that I mind hanging out with the younger generation, see today's video for proof of that, a happy birthday video for Nic who has just turned sixteen.
Well anyway, I want this collab thing finished soon so I have something completed that I can give to people. I think I'll feel less stuck then.
By the way the tennis was amazing today. Two of the best players ever in a five set Wimbledon final. We're so lucky they have each other, if there was just one of them they would just win everything practically unchallenged. But they really push each other.
This blog has stopped being about whatever it was supposed to be about.
So I'm going to stop.
p.s. I have 5 mosquito (or similar) bites all within 1 cm of each other on my left thumb. They are very annoying.
p.p.s. I hate it when people tell me a cover isn't as good as the original. Of course it isn't. I mean OF COURSE it isn't. The time and money they put into it, then I come along and record a version from my bedroom in one afternoon. That's not the point you fucking idiots. You don't understand music or life, fuck off.